We know you are out there.

Christmas is here in two days. God became man. Ponder that for a while.

I plan on putting up some photos and giving an update soon.

http://sdreharvey.blogspot.com/

Yes, we are still here...

Hi everyone who still might be looking for information on the girls...

We are still here and doing well. We miss Donna more than we can say. The girls are enrolled in school and are both growing like weeds.

We are looking to the Lord everyday for His guidance and peace through this journey.

~Scott

Coming Soon...

I'll be writing more in a couple of days.

Photos. Commentary. Good Times.

Frolicking

...in the Smoky Mountains of Tennessee

Where are you?

We have been getting along. Very busy trying to find the "new normal". Making adjustments, trying different things. Some work, some don't. Ups and Downs. Working together. Having good days and bad days.

Your prayers are still greatly needed. We appreciate all the love and support we are receiving.

Pray specifically for the girls too, that they will adjust well and lean on the Lord for their strength.

Pray for me, that I would make wise decisions (all of them! :) ).

I will try and post more later...

Happy Birthday Emily Jane!

She's 10!

Encouragement - Happy Friday the 13th!

I get a "verse a day" from a website in my email box. I really liked today's, in light of the malaise we feel sometimes. Here it is... This is "Living for the Line".

VERSE:
And if the Spirit of him who raised Jesus from the dead is
living in you, he who raised Christ from the dead will also give
life to your mortal bodies through his Spirit, who lives in you.
-- Romans 8:11

THOUGHT:
If we belong to Christ, we know the Spirit of God lives in us
(Rom. 8:9; 1 Cor. 6:19-20). Because of the Spirit's presence, we
know that we are eternal! The Spirit is God's down payment
guaranteeing that our future is with him (2 Cor. 1:21-22; 5:5).
What's more, even while we're living for Christ now, the Spirit
gives us life in our physical bodies as we use them for God's glory
(cf. Rom. 12:1).

PRAYER:
Father, animate my body with your Spirit so that what I do not
only brings you glory, but it also reflects your character and
grace. To you, O Father, be all the glory for your presence and
power that is at work within me, your child. In Jesus' name. Amen.

Enjoy!

I'll try and post more than every 2 weeks :(

The Weave

Hindsight is a good teacher. I am amazed at how looking back to the events of the past 6 months, I can see God's providential hand weaving the events together along with other peoples lives to create a tapestry that is honoring to himself. The way that he has intermingled situations and different people from all walks of our life into this wonderful, intricate, masterpiece.

I know there are people who have been touched by Donna that I don't even know about. Her impact on people always seemed positive. I'm probably biased, but I don't know of anyone who did not like her. I'm being honest now. I don't think the girl had any enemies.

One thing that cancer gave the both of us was a will to live. Really live. Not just get "things", and just "get by", but really enjoy people and build relationships with them. In some people, cancer would do just the opposite, but with Donna, she wanted to live. We wanted to experience the wonderful life that has been given to us, and to not take one day for granted. We were married for 15 years, but now it seems so short.

The girls and I recently visited the school where Donna taught 6th grade. They had an open house, and I'm thinking of sending the girls there next year. We stood in the same room that used to be hers, and I can still imagine the day that I first asked her on an impromptu date. We went to Big Boy for a quick bite to eat. We both had things to do later that night, but we were both able to go. It was not the best "proper" first date, we had one of those a few days later, but it was the start of our relationship. It seems like yesterday.

It reminds me of the previous post Donna wrote, Don't Miss It!

Another tribute to Donna

My friend, and fellow elder, Lee wrote about Donna on his blog, here. He writes for a living, I just play one on the Internet.

My girls are on the mend. Emily went to ballet tonight, and Rachel is looking and feeling better, but not quite all the way there. One more day should do it.

Still getting tons of cards and condolences from so many people. I'll be writing "Thank You" notes until 2010!

Update on the girls

Both of the girls have upper respiratory infections. They are both on antibiotics, but we are really just keeping the temperatures under control and waiting it out.


They are still cute though... :) I always told Donna she made cute babies.

Overwhelmed!

Words cannot express the overwhelmed feelings I am feeling. We have suffered a loss that is unlike anything we've ever experienced. We've encountered trials that we never imagined we would go through. I cannot tell you how much I miss Donna. I cannot tell you how much I miss Donna for me and for the girls. My favorite picture of her stares me in the face, every time I sit down in our favorite coffee spot in the house. I look at it and think, "Oh honey,..." How I wish she were here. How I wish to tell her so many things. How I wish I could ask her so many questions.

...but God

God is providing. He is providing for me and the girls like I never would have imagined. And in so many ways. Every need is being met... and much more. I see God's provision in so much of what is going on, that I'm ashamed that I doubt Him sometimes. Many times I want to try and "do something" to help Him out in some way. But what could I do?

I was talking with a good friend when Donna was in the hospital. They had been prayed that they would be able to "do" something for us. But he came to find out, that the "doing" was praying, and the "doing" was being faithful to God, and the "doing" was trusting in God in every circumstance, and not relying on our own feeble attempts. The "doing" is relying on Him; trusting in Him. That His will is good and perfect and always loving.

I still find myself trying to "do" things... and I have to catch myself, and turn back to relying on Him.

A favorite song of mine says, "[I'm] prone to wander, Lord I feel it, prone to leave the God I love..." How true that is of us who are still here. Donna is not prone to wander now... how cool is that!

Please continue to pray for me and the girls... they both are fighting something and have temperatures over 101. Probably take them to the Dr. tomorrow if they are still like this.

Camp Barakel

The girls and I are heading up to Camp Barakel this weekend. This is a place that we've loved to go to for years, it is very relaxing. Our church youth group (including Rachel) were already scheduled to go, and Emily and I are tagging along.

Emily and I will just hang out and probably go to some of the chapels, but mainly recoup (and use the awesome tubing hill! - complete with tow rope back to the top!).

I'll be sure to take my camera for some fun shots of the weekend.

Amazed

Wow! ...that's what I have to say about all the people that came to the memorial and the service on Saturday. We are very blessed to have so many people who love Donna and love us. We are still going through the cards and the guest book. I'll post how many people signed the guest book later.

Some people have asked if I'm going to continue the blog. I thought this would be the end, but I know there are some people who really want to know how we are doing down the road. So, for a while anyway, I'll continue to post updates about how the girls and I are doing.

There are so many people to thank, and later I will share some of my thoughts and some things I came to realize during this time. I hope it will help anyone going through a tough time like this as well.

A dear friend, Gwen, posted the following on her blog about Donna the other day, here. Her tribute Kaleidoscope to Donna is amazing to read. Check it out.

Thanks again.

There is a Reason

He makes all things good.

Online Guest Book

Feel free to leave a tribute to Donna here in the comments, or on the funeral home online guest book, here.

In lieu of flowers memorials may be made to the family for the future education of Rachel and Emily.

Thank you all for the wonderful outpouring of support. We are truly blessed.

Memorial Arrangements

Memorial Visitation
North Oaks Community Church
9600 Ortonville Rd.
Clarkston, MI 48348

Friday, February 13, 2009 - 1pm - Family may visit

Friday, February 13, 2009 - 2pm - 9pm - Family and Friends may visit

Memorial Service
Waterford Community Church
3900 Airport Rd.
Waterford, MI 48329

Saturday, February 14, 2009 - 11am
Friends may visit from 10am until the time of the service
Luncheon for family following the service

In lieu of flowers memorials may be made to the family for the future education of Rachel and Emily.

She has finished the race...

This morning, around 1:15am, my sweet Donna went to be with her Savior... she was truly Living for the Line to the very end.

Our friend, Robin wrote a letter to Donna that she came and read to her with the following verse, which is appropriate for Donna.

As Paul wrote to Timothy.

II Timothy 4:6-8

"For I am already being poured out like a drink offering, and the time has come for my departure. I have fought the good fight: I have finished the race. I have kept the faith. Now there is in store for me the crown of righteousness, which the Lord, the righteous Judge, will award me on that day - and not only to me, but also to all who have longed for His appearing."

I will update the blog when we have funeral arrangements.

Please continue to pray for our entire family.

Thank you.

A New Day

It's only 7:25 in the morning... but I'm encouraged by Donna's attitude and demeanor. She is ready to do whatever it takes to get well. She ordered some breakfast (a shake - it's' a start :) ), and is very lucid and alert.

Not sure how she is doing clinically, but if her mood is any indication... we are on our way!

Pray on...!

Resting on His Promises

As many of you know, today, Donna was rushed to the hospital after we called 911. Her blood pressure had dropped very low and she was so weak she could hardly do anything at all. I won't go into detail about what was going on, but suffice it to say we are thankful for the quick and timely response of the Springfield Township Fire Dept (volunteer) and Star EMS.

I thank God for the good friends and support from Loli, my mom, and Mark who were all there when we decided to make the call. I could not have done that without you guys! God is good.

Donna has sepsis again. Not sure where or how it started again, but that is the diagnosis from the ICU doctors (why does this always happen on the weekends!) It is in her blood. Hopefully this time they will be able to find the source of the infection.

Her kidneys were starting to fail, but it now looks like we may be able to work out of this. That is good news. She is complaining of a feeling of indigestion, but it is hard for her to describe the feeling or the sensation exactly. Her heart rate, blood pressure, and other vitals are all fairly normal, but may fluctuate just outside of normal for short periods of time.

She is only whispering now, even though she does not have any mouth sores or issues with her lips. Her mouth always seems to be dry. Even when she drinks, it does not seem to be enough to take care of the problem. She can't seem to get warm either. That is probably because they are filling her with fluids to get her blood pressure to rise.

On my computer wallpaper are the following sayings...

We are trying to rest on these promises as we go through these trials.

Please continue to pray for us.

If you have any specific questions, please leave a comment, and I'll try my best to answer them.

Thanks.

U of M

Oh, where to begin.

The last two days have been very tiring. I'm not sure I'll be able to get all the details down, because my thoughts are somewhat scattered, but I thought I needed to get out a post, because I'm sure there are people wondering how it is going.

Yesterday, we went to the U of M Cancer Center to get a 2nd opinion on Donna's situation. We had gone there before when Donna had her 2nd bout with cancer. We were going to see the same Dr. this time too. I could go into a lot of the details about what the Dr. said, but I'm going to give the bottom line. The Dr. basically said that Donna's liver is in bad shape. How bad, I cannot gauge exactly, but when doctors say it is not good, then you know it is really not good. Regardless of how her liver got bad, the fact now is that chemo may hurt her as much as it helps at this point. We always knew that chemo would be hard on the liver, and has the potential to "tax" the liver whenever chemo is given. That is the bottom line from the U of M.

Today I talked with our main oncologist. We agreed that that the best thing to do now is to see how Donna is responding to the new chemo over the next few days. If it seems like she is improving, then we will continue on the chemo regimen. If not, then we need to evaluate whether the dosage is reduced, or we take a break from chemo to see if things turnaround. Today she actually had a Boost shake and some raw milk for breakfast, and about 2/3 of another Boost around 3pm. This is significantly more than she has been eating over the last few weeks. I know that does not sound like a lot, and it isn't; so we are thankful that she's eaten that much today. We are going to try to get anything in her that she wants. She is still fighting nausea every once in a while; when it comes, it comes quickly.

The fluid build up has been greatly reduced since her last paracentesis, but not in the way you might think. They withdrew about 1-1/2 liters of fluid last Tuesday, but since then, she's been "leaking". There is a little drainage hole that did not get healed up, and the fluid is leaking out, pretty rapidly. So, we have to use an ostomy bag or other things to soak it all up. We are not sure when it will close up, but both St. Joe's, and U of M both looked at it.

We are still amazed and humbled at the number of people who are praying for Donna. Please don't stop! We covet your prayers. We are in the Valley of Vision... looking up for help.

Thanks,

Infusion Update

Donna was able to get her 1st infusion of the new type of chemo today. This was good, since it was going to be "iffy" the way she was feeling. The numbers were good enough to get the first dose, so we'll see how things go.

As always, we are truly impressed by the attention and professionalism of the staff at the infusion center. They take very good care of Donna. We are blessed to have nurses that truly care about their patients.

Pray for Donna as she rests tonight. She is extremely tired from moving around today from the car to the building and back again. Her stamina is very short. She could not wait to get a chance to rest when we got home today.

We are also very thankful for Donna's mom to be able to stay with us during this time. She is a joy to have around and is doing so much to keep things normal.

New Chemo today

The paracentesis went without a hitch. That was good. They drained another liter (1400 cc) of fluid from her abdomen. It just took a long time. We got into the hospital at 12:30, for the 1:30 appointment, and didn't get home until 7pm. Luckily, I got a chicken Caesar salad out of the deal for dinner.

Donna is stable. She does not appear to be getting better or worse at this point. We are hopeful for the chemo today.

We are ready to fight.

Paracentesis again today

There has been a little switch-a-roo in the plans over the next couple of days. Donna was going to get chemo today and paracentesis Wednesday, but because of the amount of fluid that has built up again it was decided to switch the two.

So, today will be the paracentesis (with anesthesia!) and tomorrow will be the first chemo with the new drug, Gemzar. We are still going to the U of M on Thursday.

We had a wonderful prayer time last night, thank you to all that were able to come and for all of you who were not there and praying for Donna. She is uplifted today.

Monday Night Prayer

Tonight, some Godly men and women are going to be coming together to pray for Donna. They will be meeting at the church at 8:00pm tonight. This is an impromptu prayer meeting, but this was much needed for Donna and me today.

Thank you North Oaks Community Church.

Neither Donna nor I can express what this means to us.

Saturday Update

It's been a couple of days since the last post, so I know there are people wondering how things are going.

Donna has been doing pretty well. She is camped out on the couch in the living room because our bed just seems to hurt her back when she sleeps there. So, the living room is now her bedroom. Her appetite is getting better, although she is still not eating that much. She had some cream-of-wheat yesterday and some yogurt, and I think she had some soup. Today, just some raw milk so far. She seems to get "full" feeling pretty quickly.

She is still not very mobile. She needs assistance to be able to get up and down from sitting to standing. Her legs are bloated with fluid too. She will be getting some compression hose for her legs to try and help this.

She had a Dr. checkup yesterday. Her numbers are pretty good, except her Bilirubin is high. This means her liver is not working as well as it should.

We've decided to get a 2nd opinion as well. It is not that we don't believe or trust the current Dr.s, quite the opposite, we REALLY trust them, but we need to research all possible options. We are going to go to U of M this Thursday (Feb 5) for a consultation. We had done this before during Donna's second bout, so we are going back again.

We are hopeful and praying that the Lord will continue to bless Donna and us through this time.

As always, we thank you for your prayers and support. There are so many people we would like to thank personally, but we just can't quite get to everyone. We are learning a lot about giving and receiving and how to be on both sides of the fence. It is harder than it seems.

John, our neighbor has been blessing us by plowing the driveway. It is not going unnoticed John, Thanks!

For His glory...

Jammy time!

We got home later than we hoped... around 4pm today. But we are glad to be home. Donna's mom is staying with us to help. Donna ate some soup for dinner and is spending the rest of the night in her comfy jammies and robe, spread out on the couch, listening to a new piano cd that was sent by a friend. The fireplace is on and the girls are tucked away into bed.

She will see the oncologist on Friday for a follow-up and some blood work. Then, next Tuesday she will start a new chemo, Gemcitabine (Gemzar), once a week for 3 weeks, then off one week.

Please pray that the chemo works as intended.

We covet your prayers and know that Lord hears them.

James 5:16
"Therefore, confess your sins to one another and pray for one another, that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous person has great power as it is working."

Coming Home!

We are in the process of discharging... she will be home today!

Done with that procedure

Donna is done with the procedure.

They drained 2-1/2 liters of fluid out of her body. That's like a 5-lb baby! They are going to analyze the fluid again to check for malignant cells in the fluid, but we are not expecting them to be malignant since the previous analysis was benign the last time this was done. She is still groggy from the anesthesia, but all indications are positive. This went much better. They used the CT scanner to locate the best place to go in, and only had to poke her once. And she never felt a thing, because she was out. Out like a light!

Wonderful!

This Morning...

Donna is now in for her paracentesis... with anesthesia!

Here's hoping!

Wow!

Ever since we've been in the hospital during this time, we've wondered if they were going to need to remove more fluid from her abdomen. We told every person who brought it up that she would need to be put under for the procedure. All the doctors and nurses that we talked to knew what we wanted.

It was scheduled for today, but we never knew what time. They showed up around 7am to say they are on their way to get her for the procedure. We again, reiterate the fact that she needs to be put under. "Yup.. yup, we understand". Donna wanted me to go as far as I could go before they would not let me any further before the procedure. So, we get down to the room where they are going to do the procedure, and out comes the same nurse that had been with Donna the previous time. I commented that she was the same nurse, and recounted the episode with her. She remembered Donna and again we talked about how bad it was and how she needs to be put under - she needs to not know what is going on or be aware during the procedure. With all that she's been through this week, the last thing she would need is another terrible experience with this thing.

The nurse understood, and went back into the room to "talk to the Dr." When she returned, she said they would give her something to decrease the anxiety, but that she would still be aware and may still feel something. Immediately, we both comment, "No, that is not going to be acceptable." The nurse again tried to talk her into it, saying things like, "The Dr. won't do it that way", and that they were going to use the CT machine to get more precise on the placement of the needle. Nope - still not good enough. We were not going to budge on this.

In the end, she was wheeled back to the room and the procedure was rescheduled for 8am tomorrow - with anesthesia. Her oncologist came by and we told him the story. He said they may try to work it in still today, but that it might still be tomorrow.

One thing I'm noticing about the medical profession - you (as a patient) need to keep very good track of what is going on and who said what and when. I'm keeping notes every time a Dr. is in the room. You need to stay on top of things. The information goes through so many hands, and their are so many people involved that the information can easily slip through the cracks. Even when we thought everyone knew what we wanted, it was going to be done the same way it was done the first time. Wow!

Today and Tomorrow

Today, Donna had some more visitors. This really brightened her day. But she was also very tired afterwards. The mouth sores are still an issue and sound like they are going to take some time to heal. She is trying her best to eat what she can, but even things as soft as whipped potatoes are hard to eat!

Tomorrow, Donna is going to have some of the excess fluid in her abdomen and legs extracted. This is the procedure that went so badly for her the last time it was done. This time, she is going to go "under".

Thanks Mike and Sue for taking over today. I truly appreciate you.

Good Friends

Donna had a good friend come in from out of town today - this really brightened her day. I had known she was going to be coming to town since Thursday and did not tell Donna. So, when she got here, she was very surprised and excited to see her.

Thank God for good friends!

The Battle Belongs to the Lord

Met with the oncologist last evening. It was a "good news / bad news" kind of discussion.

The GOOD news:

1. What she was brought into the hospital for originally last Saturday (septic shock) has been cleared up.
2. All her vitals are good and stable. She is only on a small amount of IV fluids now and a small amount of antibiotics. They are no longer monitoring her heart rate, blood pressure, and oxygen all the time.
3. She is physically gaining strength back.
4. Her "fight" is good. She has a good attitude.

The BAD news:

1. The chemo drug being used for her treatment is no longer working (Abraxane). The Dr. said it probably worked 20% - then did not work any longer after the initial improvement. We knew it was working initially as she began feeling better and most indications showed that she was improving.
2. The latest CT scan has shown the lesions on the liver are bigger and worse. I didn't think to ask what "worse" meant at the time, but I will later. Did it mean that it is now more aggressive? Does it mean there are now more lesions? I'll need to clarify this more when we talk again.
3. The main issue now is the liver. She still has fluid build up and swelling in the abdomen and legs.
4. Her mouth is still extremely sore and she is still having a hard time eating much real food. She is able to drink a lot of water and cranberry juice, so that's good.

Is there a new plan?

1. The Dr. is going to change her chemo regimen since the Abraxane is no longer having effect. They need something that is not as hard on the liver. They said they will have a plan by Wednesday this coming week. They have some options, but finding a chemo that is "easy" on the liver is the challenge, there are not that many.
2. She may have more fluid drained. They have not decided on this yet, but think this may happen on Monday. This is the same procedure that was so painful before. They will be putting her under for this procedure this time.

What can she do in the meantime?

1. She needs to push herself to eat. This will help get her strength back.

How is she doing - really?

1. The situation is still very serious. Now with the Sepsis gone, the concern turns back to the liver. I asked the Dr. about the break she had in chemo when the kidney stone situation arose. He said we might have had a CT scan a couple of weeks earlier if she had stayed on course and we would have found out a little earlier. That was less time than I had thought, but it would still have taken time to get through the chemo and have a CT scan. So, basically we are 2 weeks behind where we would have been.
2. Her attitude is good - she is ready to fight. But we know that our strength only comes from one place - Jesus Christ. Our lives are in his hands.

What can you do?

1. Pray for healing for her body.
2. Pray that she would be able to eat more.
3. Pray for no nausea.
4. Pray for the girls and me - for understanding, perspective, and peace.

Sola Deo Gloria!

A "Shout out" to St. Joe's

We need to send a "shout out" to St. Joe's. The care Donna has recieved is wonderful. Everyone of Donna's doctors and nurses has been wonderful. I'm thankful to God for providing people who really care about her and for the way he has put people we know, or friends of friends, all around her. I didn't realize how many people we knew! It feels like the six degrees of Kevin Bacon.

Finally Moved

Donna was finally moved today around 5pm to the cancer floor - 4G. Her new room is really nice. It is like a hotel room. Big window and everything. She will get some good rest here. The nurses don't come in as often, but are always available by buzzer.

We had another answered prayer today with the good new of the brain CT.

We continue to look forward to good news about the liver and abdomen tomorrow.

Good night...

Another good news story!

Donna came back from the CT scan within an hour and a half.

On my way back from lunch, I saw the oncologist in the hallway and interrupted his conversation with another person to ask if he would be coming up to let us know of the results.

He said he would be up in a few minutes.

Here's what he said:

1. There is a spot on her brain, but does not appear to be malignant! (positive for cancer)
2. It appears to be calcified - if it were cancerous it would most likely not be calcified!
3. With cancer, there would be swelling around the spot - there is no swelling!
4. There is no mid-line shift in her brain - meaning the brain with shift off-center from the tumor (and the swelling) and the brain will not be "centered".

In other words, he said, it does not have any of the characteristics of malignant cancer in her brain!

This is great news!

We won't hear the other results until sometime tomorrow.

Down for the CT scan now

Donna is down for her CT scan right now. They are going from the pelvis all the way up to the brain.

She seems more alert to me today. Her mouth is still really sore. She said she is feeling better today. It seems like she is able to take more down, although, she did not have hardly anything for breakfast.

She took the CT contrast easily today, so that was an answer to prayer!

We were told by the ICU nurse that the results would be available today. I called our chemo nurse, and she said that the oncologist will be out this afternoon. This may be why he said he would discuss the results tomorrow at 5pm, but if we can, I'm pushing to find out today. The results will be what they will be, but I'd like to know today if I could.

If I find out today, you will too.

I know there are so many people praying for Donna and for me and the girls. That means so much to us. We thank you more than we can express.

Please Pray...

The next two days are critical to me. Today they are going to be doing some CT scans. At least one for the liver, and one for her brain. Donna has been confused since I took her in. She misses facts and can't remember from one moment to the next sometimes. At first, they said this was from the medication and being in ICU, and the shock of being well, and then suddenly ill.

Today... right now if you can, please pray that the cancer has not spread to her brain or any other areas.

I'm trusting in the Lord... but I can't ignore the lump in my stomach when I think about this.

Tomorrow are the results.

I know you all are praying for a total miraculous healing. I am too.

Some Good news!

Just met with the Dr. Here's the highlights...

1. White blood count is back to normal! (this is wonderful news! Also, we no longer have to wear masks when being in her room. We can kiss her face!)
2. Lungs are good
3. Heart is good
4. Kidneys are good
5. The liver is neither improving nor getting worse at this point.
6. There is still some fluid on her belly. He did not say what was going to be done with this at this time.
7. CT scan is being scheduled for tomorrow. (Using these results, they are going to reevaluate the chemo strategy. Pray that Donna will be able to take down the contrast that is needed to do the scan. She has not done well taking this down when she is healthy, let alone what it could be like now!)
8. They are going to try and do some sort of treatments on the liver (non-chemo) while she is still in the hospital to see if they can improve it.

Your prayers are being answered!

Well we're movin' on up...

Donna should be moving to the cancer floor in the hospital sometime today. The Dr. said there is no longer any reason for her to be in ICU. They just don't have a bed for her on the floor right now. He also said that her mouth would heal 100%. The sores and soreness would be gone in a few days and her mouth will return to normal. This is good because she needs to eat!

Donna's sister will be watching the girls for the next couple of days. She also home schools her daughter, which is nice, so the girls will continue on with their studies as well, plus get some fun cousin time. This is just a temporary set-up, but one that will really help the girls and me to stabilize a little.

Donna's legs were swollen yesterday. They think this is fluid build up in the legs. She has some compression stockings on and they have given her some medication to reduce the swelling and cut down on her fluid intake through her IV.

Thank you to everyone who is supporting us and praying for us. We've received so many cards and well wishes, we can't thank everyone individually, but we wish we could. It would be a full-time job just to keep track of it all!

Many people have asked how they can help. Right now, the best way is to pray for her. This is not only good for her, but good for you too! I think the girls have a different perspective on things right now, but I have not had a good chance to talk with them one on one to determine how they are taking it all in. Emily, last night, came downstairs sad - because of seeing mom "all wired up" yesterday. I spent some time talking to her about how she has been very sick and that those things are going to help her get better. And she is getting better! She felt better, and I gave her a piggy-back ride back to bed.

I'll update later today with more news.

Making Progress

The girls came and saw Donna first thing this morning. They were both missing each other. The girls will be home for a few days.

Donna's stats are very stable now. The biggest obstacle at the moment is that she's not been able to eat much. The sores in her throat are so bad, she cannot take much down. We are pushing here to eat, but it is just frustrating her now, so we will wait until her throat feels better and is able to eat.

Two of the chemo nurses came by to see Donna today, that was also encouraging. They encouraged Donna that she is on her way to getting better.

The oncologist wants to meet with me this afternoon. I think he just wants to talk about her progress. I'll update after the meeting.

She will be moving out if ICU sometime today.

More later...

So Much

There is so much to think about and things I want to express, but I'm not going to be able to get them all in this post. I'm going to try and put out shorter ones over the course of time.

Here's what I'm thankful for over the last couple of days (in no particular order). I could write a lot about all of these things, but I'm just going to mention them and get them off my mind.

• Modern Medicine
• A family who really cares (natural and church)
• A praying church family (wow! - Thank you all!)
• Doctors who have wisdom and clear and quick thinking
• Nurses who care
• Information that is readily available (the world wide web)
• A loving Father (Abba)
• Quiet solitude
• Prayer
• Shared burdens

We met with the Doctor today. She was in serious trouble when we brought her in on Saturday night. I did not realize how bad. I understand now, that she had Sepsis leading to Septic shock, which is very serious. Things could have been much worse for her. I'm very thankful that she got into the hospital when she did.

Bottom line, she is at the tail end of the septic shock. This is wonderful news, as this has been our biggest concern over the last 24 hours. Since the Sepsis is a systemic thing, we have to see how all of this has effected her liver. Her liver is not doing as well as we had hoped. Her heart, lungs, and kidneys are all doing fine. She had an echo cardiogram today, but I don't know the results yet.

The doctor delivered this new to my parents and brother, Donna's parents and sister, and our pastor. He had requested a meeting with me and any family members that I would want there.

Tomorrow or the following day she is having a CT scan to help determine if the tumors on her liver have changed.

Donna can hardly talk right now... the sores in her mouth are bad, so she is really just whispering. Even close, sometimes it is hard to tell what she is saying.

Tomorrow I'm going to bring the girls up to see her. They have not seen her since late on Saturday, before they went to their Grandparent's house to spend the night.

Thanks to Beth Curd for sending out the following email, that pretty much sums it up...

"Hello everyone,

I don't think Scott has had time to update the blog and Beth Brown need not call everyone with an update, so I offered to send out this email. You may or may not know that the doctors requested to meet with Scott and the family this morning. That prompted a quick gathering to spend some time in group prayer for them. Thank you to those of you who were able to meet today at church to pray for Donna and Scott, Rachel and Emily and for those who are praying everywhere. It was a wonderful time of prayer for them and us. Scott and Donna and their parents met with the oncologist and the news is promising, though Donna's condition is still very serious. As far as the sepsis goes, things are looking better, and they see signs of her body improving. However Donna is still not out of the woods with it. Regarding her cancer, they just don't know at this point in time whether her condition has changed. Donna's organs are functioning well with the exception of her liver. Please keep praying.

Peace,

Beth Curd"

More later...

Secret Snowblower

Whoever plowed our driveway for us...

You have blessed us. Thank you!

ICU

We thought Donna was on her way. We thought that we had been through the worst. She started out Saturday so well. She had had some coffee, some yogurt and was resting peacefully. Later in the day, my parents stopped by to drop off one of the girls from an activity. We had decided that it would be good for the girls to do something fun, since they too had not really been out of the house much in the last few days. It has been so cold, they couldn’t play outside, and I’ve been busy taking care of Donna. I didn’t have the time to be able to take them out or do something fun with them. So, we decided they would spend the night over at Grandma and Grandpa’s house. They have cable.

Donna still had not eaten much and it was starting to get dinner time. I pushed soup on her, but it was too thick and peppery for her to really take in. Her throat was still very sore and tender, like she had strep throat. The combination did not do well with her. I got concerned when, again, she was not eating much. I let her rest some more. Every once in a while I would talk with her. Sometimes she would reply with an incoherent response. Sometimes she would just stay asleep. I noticed the veins in her neck pulsating away. But they were going very fast. Faster than they should. I got close to her face, so I could see them close up, and also notice she was very hot. I decided to take her temperature. The readout said 103.5. That can’t be right. She sat up for me to take it again. 103.2. This was the deciding factor. I was taking her in to emergency.

The drive to the hospital was somewhat slow, as we were in the middle of getting 5 inches of new snow. We arrived at emergency, and they got us right into Triage. They were also quick about getting us to a cubby in the emergency review area. Then came the wait…

We had arrived at the hospital at 9pm. It was now 10:45pm before a Dr. came to talk with us. A nurse had taken Donna’s information and history, but there were no IV’s until we’d seen the Dr. Her temperature was still pretty high, and he was also concerned with her high heart rate (142 bpm) and her low blood pressure (in the 70’s on the top). He examined her mouth and determine that she was fighting some kind of infection. He had blood work ordered, as well as other tests and also a couple of different antibiotics. They quickly got her IV in (through the port) and the tests underway. She also had an EKG done and later, a chest x-ray.

It was also decided that she would be in the ICU all night. They were going to monitor her very closely. This obviously concerned me, as I’m wondering why it was that urgent that she be in the ICU. The Dr. assured me that it was because she was septic, fighting some kind of infection, this was why the close monitoring would be needed (I’m thankful for that now).

They gave her Motrin in order to get her fever and her heart rate down. Although at first, we reluctant for her to take it, since we thought that might be the cause of some of the nausea she had been previously battling, but in the end, she took it.

Because her white blood count was so low, she was put in a special room that requires everyone to wear a mask to avoid spreading any germs. Her immunity is very low and would be very susceptible to picking up any germs or viruses. This is kind of nice, since she is the only one in the room.

They gave her 5 liters of fluid to start with, along with a couple of antibiotics. This helped bring her blood pressure up. Right now (Sunday night), has the following numbers as I write this:

1. Heart Rate – 113
2. Blood Pressure – 88/45
3. Oxygen – 91
4. Temperature – Normal

The doctors and nurses have been very thorough and accommodating. Donna is doing much better now. It had been one of the longest nights of my life. I just didn’t know what was going to happen. I prayed a lot. Didn’t sleep much. Only when I could see Donna’s stats were stable, then I would take a quick snoozer.

We had some visitors today, both parents came, as well as my brother and sister-in-law and our pastor. We all prayed together for Donna’s healing – however that is to come.

As far as visitors, I would ask that you call me first. She is going to need her rest. This is her first priority. I’m the gatekeeper. Right now, I think rest is the most important thing for her. Until she gets much better, I don’t think it is best for her to have many visitors. I’ll do my best to keep everyone informed through this journal.

Thank you for praying for her. I really believe she is going to pull through this just fine. It has already taken a lot of hard work and care from the doctors and nurses here at the hospital to make that happen.

The next step is to get her stabilized and moved out of the ICU to the cancer floor of the hospital. Not sure what the next few days are going to bring, but we are trusting in the Lord.

Today

Donna is still very groggy from the anti-nausea medication. Her mouth is still extremely sore. She is taking some medication for that as well to reduce the soreness. Hopefully this will clear up in a couple of days.

She is very thin right now. She did take in more fluids yesterday, some yogurt, soup, and a protein shake. This morning she had a few sips of coffee.

She has a rash around her mid-section and in some places on her back and neck. The Dr.s are going to try and determine if this is from the chemo itself, or from the liver.

An overzealous husband called our favorite chemo nurse this morning to see if she thought Donna was making good progress and to see if her current symptoms warranted another trip to the hospital. If she starts to feel any different (worse), then I'm going to take her in to the hospital.

Donna says she is feeling better than she looks. For me, this is hard to tell, since it is hard for her to talk and she is still foggy.

Again, we can't thank you all enough for the prayer support and the offers for help.

We are trusting in our Savior that His will is being worked out in all of this.

She's Doing Much Better!

Donna is feeling much better. The nausea being under control is a major blessing! Her symptoms now are (1) an extremely dry mouth (so much so, she has a hard time talking), (2) very sore "insides", (3) and sore throat (neck). She is still very drowsy, but I hope today that will also subside and the cloud will begin to lift.

We can't thank you all enough for praying for us and for taking the girls while we need to go to these appointments.

I'm also amazed at how the Lord is working things out with her care, my job, the people attending to her (Dr.s and nurses), and the support we are receiving from all of you!

This has been a rough month, but we hope we are over the hump now!

Pray:

1. That the Lord would renew her strength, spiritually and physically (we know he will!).
2. Her appetite would increase and nausea will not be an issue.
   
3. That the blood work to be taken on Monday will return good results.
4. That she would be able to get a full dose of chemo on Tuesday.

We trust in the Lord.

Sola Deo Gloria!

More fluids please

From Donna's appointment this morning...

Here are the Dr.'s observations:

1. She is Jaundice
   
2. There is slightly more fluid in the belly area. They are going to keep an eye on this. Nothing is going to be drained at this point.
   
3. There is a rash around the belly area. We thought this was from all of the baths that Donna was taking. Whenever she is feeling kinda bad, she takes a bath to let everything "float". This brings some temporary relief. The Dr. is thinking the rash could be a liver rash or it could be from the chemotherapy. To help determine which, he has scheduled some blood work to be done on Monday.
4. Chemo was scheduled for Monday, but now with the lab work being done then, it is tentatively scheduled for Tuesday. It depends on the results of the blood work.

I'm still with her at the hospital. They have internet access through some terminals here, that's how I'm able to update the blog from here. Kinda cool. They have wireless too, but I didn't bring my laptop, thinking we'd be outta her this morning.

They are going to give her more fluids today; with Potassium, but no more anti-nausea or pain meds at this point. This is going to take 2 - 3 hours.

More updates later...

She's Home Now

It is somewhat hard to tell how Donna is feeling, since she is so sleepy and drugged from the day at the hospital, but she has to be feeling better than she was. She says she is feeling better, but she will spend the rest of the day and night in bed.

We have another appointment tomorrow at 10am to checkup on her. Depending on how she feels, they could (1) keep her all day to administer fluids again, or (2) send her back home since she's feeling better.

I'm hoping for the second option!

Who's with me! :)

Update

Last night was another rough night for Donna. She could not get comfortable, constantly nauseated, and unable to keep anything down.

This morning, she was not feeling any better, so I called the chemo nurses to see what could be done to get her feeling better. We got an appointment with the Dr.'s assistant (who Donna loves) to get a look at her and see what could be done to get her to feel better.

The Dr.'s assistant decided it would be a good thing to keep Donna all day. Get some fluid in her, get her some new nausea medication, and new pain medication.

She had been on Zomata for nausea, and was taking Ibrofen for slighter pain, Roxinal for more severe pain. The assistant thought that the ibprofen might be upsetting her stomach, so she put her on something else.

Thankfully, our good friend (and wonderful piano teacher) was able to take the girls this morning. That was truly a blessing. She had offered to come over to give the lesson today, but when she heard what were planning, she offered to keep the girls while we were at the appointment.

Please Pray:

1. That God would be glorified in all this, above all.
2. Donna would recover from this weak state and regain her strength and continue on her chemo regimen.
3. The girls would be at peace with everything going on. (they are being wonderful with all the shuffling around lately)
4. That I would be able to keep things together :)

We know that this is happening for a reason.

**

Just talked with the Dr. They are going to check on her again at 5:00pm to decide if she can go home for the night or if they will admit her to the hospital.

Thanks everyone!

Keep on keeping on...

Please pray that Donna would be able to keep some food down. She is having a hard time finding anything that even sounds palatable while she has nausea.

Pray that her strength would return quickly and that this fluid build up would dissipate quickly too.

Today was a real hard day for her.

Good News!

Thank you all for the extra prayers yesterday. The results of the tests on the fluid from my belly was negative for cancer cells! That was great news. It means that we can stick to the chemo regimen that we've been doing. I was given a larger dose yesterday, and the doctors believe that the remaining fluid will dissipate on its own.

They also assured me that if fluid must be drained again, they will give me some "twilight" anesthesia so I won't experience the agony I had on Friday.

Please pray that the fluid will dissipate quickly, as this is causing constant nausea and frequent vomiting. I am very weak and need to keep some food down to regain my strength. I'm longing to feel well enough to do some of my "normal" activities as a wife/mom/teacher! Also pray for Scott. He is right by my side during all the rough times, and he is balancing his work and mine with strength, a smile and many encouraging words.

We waited...

I know it seems like we are not posting very often. Obviously, there is a lot going on. To bring you up to date from the last post...

The stent came out on Monday. But even before that, on Sunday, Donna had noticed her belly getting larger. This was not from overeating, as she has not had much of an appetite, between the nausea and the pain of the stent, but from something else.

The Urologist, when he removed the stent, said it was nothing to worry about and she should give it 24 hours to get back to normal. He didn't examine her, he didn't push on anything. To us, he just blew it off.

Well, we waited...

Tuesday came and it was no better. It had not gone down. In fact, it seemed slightly bigger.

But, we waited...

By Thursday, it was getting noticeably bigger. Now keep in mind, we are not ones to just sit around and wait. We knew something needed to be done with it, but we also knew that she was going to see the oncologist on Friday when she was scheduled to get chemo.

On Thursday afternoon, our favorite chemo nurse sent Donna to have an abdominal ultrasound, which showed fluid built up in her abdominal cavity. This is known as ascites.

(The procedure itself was one of the most traumatizing experiences Donna has ever had. Even now, days after the procedure, she cannot really talk much about it without getting very emotional. I don't want to detail the experience here, but please pray that if they need to do that procedure again, that we would have the option to do it while she is under anesthesia.)

When Donna went for chemo on Friday, a wonderful Dr.'s assistant quickly made her an appointment to have the fluid drained at the hospital, then tested to see if cancer cells were present in the fluid. We will receive those results tomorrow, as well as start chemo again.

Donna's prayer requests are:

1. If fluids need to be drained again, that the procedure take place while she is under anesthesia.
2. Wisdom for the Dr. and the assistant in making decisions about which direction to take next.
3. That we would not fear the worst, that we would trust Christ every moment.
   

Gone, but not forgotten

The stent is out (thank you Lord!), but there is still pain in that area. The x-rays showed the kidney stone has passed, but Donna is still not very comfortable.

We were hoping that when it came out, there would be a noticeable difference... that the pain would subside. So far, it has not, but we are waiting to see what tomorrow brings. The Dr. said to give it 24 hours, then her body should return to normal (whatever that is).

Pray that Donna would receive the healing that we so desire. If it is God's will, it will happen.

We look forward to tomorrow.

Happy New Year!

New Year

A Puritan prayer, from the book, "The Valley of Vision"

"O Lord,

Length of days does not profit me except the days are passed
in thy presence, in thy service, to thy glory.

Give me a grace that precedes, follows, guides, sustains,
sanctifies, and aids every hour,
that I may not be one moment apart from thee,
but may rely on your Spirit
to supply every thought,
speak in every word,
direct every step,
prosper every work,
build up every mote of faith,
and give me a desire
to show forth thy praise,
testify thy love,
advance thy kingdom.

I launch my bark on the unknown waters of this year,
with thee, O Father, as my harbour,
thee, O Son at my helm,
thee, O Holy Spirit, filling my sails.

Guide me to heaven with my loins girt,
my lamp burning,
my ear open to thy calls,
my heart full of love,
my soul free.

Give me thy grace to sanctify me,
thy comforts to cheer,
thy wisdom to teach,
thy right hand to guide,
thy counsel to instruct,
thy law to judge,
thy presence to stabilize.

May thy fear be my awe,
thy triumphs my joy."